


Taste My Big Toblerone

by dontcallmeking



Category: Neo Yokio
Genre: Crack, M/M, dont but your dicks in chocolate, i wrote this with sarah, im sorry, one of my roommates, red car emoji and i drunk write, so do they ;), stay ins chol kids, the only correct thing spelt is Toblerone, this show sucks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-25
Updated: 2017-09-25
Packaged: 2019-01-05 04:59:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12183345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontcallmeking/pseuds/dontcallmeking
Summary: i can barely navigate the hellish time between breakfast and dinner, how do you expect me to navigate the fields of love?





	Taste My Big Toblerone

**Author's Note:**

> i'm sorry

it was a normal day in neo yokio, especially at bognadorf's coat store. kaz kaan, an eligible bachelor for the most part, needed a new suit for some social event or whatever. 

"wow! neo yokio's #1 eligible bachelor! it's almost like you live here." shouted richard ayowady. kaz raised up a hand and closd his eyets

"not now salesclearks without a name, i need a new suit for my social event. fashion is imprtoant to me"

"AS IT SHOULD BE," archangelo says suddenly appearing out of no where. 

"wHAT sre you doing here?" asks kaz not wnating him to be there

"i live here." archangelo says.. "rather, than just you dreamig about it i've achieved it."

"bys boys boys," says richard. "take it to the dressing room. i'll bring you some suits to try on for the social event."

"thanks salescleaking," says kaz kind of polite byt not really. archangelo says nothing cause he's a douchebag with no real friends only pastel short wearing gentelmen.

the two enemies walk next toeach otherwithout speaking bc they dont want to and the tension is SO THICC. they could cut it with a nknife but they didnt ahve one.

there is an awkwarc moment as they both try to walk into the first dressing room. you know the feeling when u want to go first but someone else is like 'hey no that's mine you can't have it' but internally so nothings actuallly said and for somereason havig the first seat at a restaurant or dressnig room is a form ofdiominance over other shoppers. thats what happened to them. kaz started to walk in and then archangelo was like 'no!' and tried to as well, but it didn't work out so there were some awkar d grunts and 'heyyys' and 'huhs' as they tried to sidestep before archangelo suceeded the dressing room and went to the second one. as ususal.

"so what's with the Toblerlone?" asked kaz "been a long time since i've seen one of those."

 "because i'm worth it." enjaculated arcchangelo 

"do i even remember what they taste liek? probably not depression like the res of my life." kaz aishs sadly

"you can... have a bite if you want ;)" archanel said not wantig to make kaz enven more derpessed than usual. he was so derpessed all the time from stupid thisngs. like stupid cathy. whose lush blonde hairdid NOT hold a canlde to archangelo's. he's known for his lush locks after all. most elibible bachelor AND most beautfiul blonde in all neo yokio. whta did cathy have that he didn't? some boobs??? not a dick??? archanagelo got an aidea. 

"pppssstttt. kaz... hey kaz... kaz." archengleo stage whispered. 

"archegenlo we're literally two feet away from each other what do you wnat?" kaz did not stage whisper 

"seriously homie come get a taste." archengelo said seductively while wetting his blump plips. 

"of what" questioned kaz seductively wetting his plimp blips. 

"my big Toblerone." archangelo smuggly requested. 

"hold on" kaz coyly remarked. he reached into his pocket and pulled out a full sized drill (like an actual one). slowly he aligned the drill to the wall before he cut a trainglur whole in the wall. "sent it on through... hymie" kaz called out 

"one big, mega dong-i mean Toblruene coming through....  _homei_ " archangely already having put his dick into the Toblellne puts the box through, hodleing his dick at hte base.  somehowe kaz had drilled the hole at the perfect height for his dick to fit through with the Toblernon. 

"wowy" kaz says with a chukcle. "i'venever seen a Toblerone this bgi before. it's strangely curvd. like a dick." (if it was a dick he wouldnt be mad. he had a thikng for blonde.s)

"i bought it at spicer's topic." archangel y says quickly. 

"i didn't know they sold them there."

"tbey do."

"okay." kaz looks at the Toblerno. "can you send it al the way through"

"no its too tight" archengla says not wanting kaz to rip ihs dick off. "just bend over and lick it where it is."

kaz doesnt think thats how it works but he doens't want to waste time qustioning archenolg when he cOULD be eating a nice big, juicy Toblrnone. he gets on his knees and leans forward, gently picking up the suspicosuly warm Toblernon into his ahnds. archegonly makes a weird sound ont hte other sid eof the wall. "it's so warm."

"its the energy from the calories," archenlyingo didnt graduate high school. kaz starts to lick the Toblernone not listening to arhcengo on the other side of the wall because it tasted SO. GOod. he keeps lickiing befoere realizing osmehting. "hey is this your dick?"

"yeah it seemed like a good idea at the time." archelgon says sheepishly before grunting as kaz keeps likcing it. archelogo being a virgin, came quickly. kaz swallowd with a grin knowing what the other bachelor was putting down or should i say... putting out.

"i love cream filled ;)" 

"kaz...omg. im' so embarrased."

" dont be i just didn't realize u felt this way about me, homie."

"i just realizwd it too. i'm in love with you kaz."

"omg same. mood."

 

neo yokio's first and second most eligible bachelors were no longer as eligible as before. because they were married. they weren't happy. but they were married. 

**Author's Note:**

> sarah and i only watched the first two episodes and were inspired . sarah is one fo my roommates


End file.
